You’re not broken. You’re just not in the driver’s seat.
IFS therapy in Seattle.
What is IFS therapy?
Internal Family Systems therapy, or IFS, is founded on one key insight: the mind is not a single, unified thing. It’s organized more like a family, or a community of distinct inner voices, each with its own perspective, its own emotional age, its own history of how and why it came to be.
You’ve probably already met some of these voices.
- The part of you that works relentlessly because another part of you feels like it’s never enough.
- The part that goes quiet and withdrawn when conflict arises.
- The harsh inner critic who nitpicks every little detail of your mistakes.
- The numb, flat feeling that takes over when life feels like too much.
These aren’t personality flaws or signs of dysfunction. They’re strategies that developed at some point to help you get through life. And, importantly, each of them is only one part of your inner world—not the entirety.
Leading with Self-compassion
IFS holds that beneath all these inner voices, there’s a core, undamaged, unshakable Self. When people tap into Self, they consistently report feeling calm, curious, compassionate, and capable of leading their inner world rather than being controlled by it. And this is one of the goals of IFS—to help you develop “Self-leadership.”
What makes IFS distinctive is its underlying posture of respect toward every part of you, even the ones causing the most trouble. Nothing inside you is the enemy. Everything developed for a reason. The question isn’t “how do I get rid of this?” but “what is this trying to protect me from, and does it know there might be another way?” We can only develop Self-leadership by turning toward these parts of ourselves, rather than trying to shove them out of existence.
How does IFS therapy work?
In practice, Internal Family Systems therapy is a guided process of turning inward—not to analyze yourself from a distance, but to make contact with the different voices living inside you.
Here’s an example of what this can look like. Imagine you’re overwhelmed by a familiar wave of self-criticism after making a mistake at work. Ordinarily, you might fight it, agree with it, or simply push past it. In IFS, we’ll slow down and get curious: How do you notice this critic? Tension in the body? Racing thoughts? What does it sound like? How old does it feel? Often, when people turn toward this inner voice and listen—really listen—they discover it’s not cruel for cruelty’s sake. It’s terrified. It learned, somewhere along the way, that if it criticized you first, the world’s criticism would hurt less.
From reacting to relating
This is the movement at the heart of IFS: from reacting to relating, from being swept away by an inner experience to meeting it from your calm, compassionate Self.
IFS therapy sessions often involve a mix of talk and inner explorations—following a feeling or image inward, noticing what arises, and gently asking questions rather than forcing answers. It can feel unfamiliar at first, even strange. Most of us weren’t taught to relate to our inner lives this way. We were taught to manage, suppress, or override what we feel.
What IFS therapy can help with
IFS is designated an evidence-based practice by SAMHSA, with research supporting its use for trauma, depression, and anxiety. In my work, I’ve seen it help people with a wide range of issues, including:
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Grief and loss
- Trauma and PTSD/CPTSD
- Shame and self-criticism
- People-pleasing and perfectionism
- Fear of abandonment
- Anxious and avoidant attachment patterns
- Relationship difficulties
- The weight of harmful cultural conditioning
- Feeling stuck, lost, or disconnected from yourself
- Navigating life transitions and identity exploration
Your IFS therapist in Seattle
There’s a saying in the therapy world, “therapists can only take clients as far as they’ve gone themselves.” I take this seriously, which is why I’ve been in my own IFS therapy since 2017. Internal Family Systems isn’t theoretical to me. It’s something I know from the inside out.
I completed my Level 1 IFS training in 2020 and receive ongoing supervision from a certified IFS therapist. I’ve spent years getting to know my own parts, healing my own wounds, and learning to show up from Self. And these experiences have taught me more about IFS than any book or training.
I built my Seattle practice around IFS because I’ve watched it do what other therapies promise but rarely deliver: lasting change that’s effortless to maintain.
Frequently asked questions
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We start the way most therapy starts—talking about what’s going on in your life and what you’re hoping to work on. From there, I’ll guide you in turning your attention inward to notice what’s happening inside. I might ask you to notice a feeling in your body, or to get curious about a thought or emotional reaction that keeps coming up. Over time, this process gets more specific—we’ll get to know the parts involved, find out what they need, and work to help them release what they’ve been carrying. I’ll walk you through every step. You don’t need to know how any of this works coming in.
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Honestly, yes—at first. Turning your attention inward and getting curious about your own emotional reactions isn’t what most people expect therapy to look like. Most of my clients find it a little unusual for the first few sessions, and then something clicks. Once it does, it tends to feel natural and intuitive.
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This comes up a lot, and it’s one of the reasons I never force standard IFS language or a one-size-fits-all approach on anyone. Some people visualize their parts clearly. Others feel them as physical sensations, shifts in mood, or changes in the quality of their thinking. Some just notice that they’re suddenly saying things they didn’t consciously decide to say. All of these are valid entry points. IFS was developed by listening carefully to how people actually describe their inner worlds—which means it’s designed to support your experience, not the other way around.
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It depends on what you’re working on. Some things shift meaningfully in a few months. Deeper work—healing significant trauma, rewiring attachment patterns, rebuilding your relationship with yourself—typically takes longer, often a year or more of weekly sessions. That said, you’ll notice shifts along the way, not just at the end. And depending on your needs, I may integrate EMDR into our work, which can help accelerate certain parts of the healing process.
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I see clients in person in Seattle’s U-District and online throughout Washington state.
Something different is possible. Let’s find out if IFS parts work is right for you.
Ready to get started? I offer a free 20-minute introductory call, where we can get to know each other, talk about what’s bringing you to therapy, and see if working together feels like a good fit. And if it does, we’ll schedule your first session before we hang up.